Practical Help for Trying Times
All of the things that seemed so sure just a few weeks ago have been tossed into a hurricane of uncertainty. Like many of you, I am grasping to find a new "normal", as it changes by the hour. Lives have been upended on a global scale and there is a certain level of trauma in that. As someone who has navigated lots of trauma, both my own and the trauma of others, I want to share the things that I believe will help us in these trying times.I am also sharing a link to a guide with a JACKPOT of community resources for LA County.
HUMOR IS SAVING MY LIFE RIGHT NOW
Humor can be therapeutic. This is why some of the funniest people I know are trauma survivors. Humor helps us process and cope with our grief and trauma. Laughter produces endorphins that help us feel better. My friends and I have been spending as much time sharing funny memes as we have news updates. This particular post and comment thread has had me in stitches! For the record, one of my coworkers screamed at me every time I focused on something other than him. But he also told me he loves me several times. My other coworker did a week’s worth of work in a day and a half and incessantly asked me what she should next.Check out my girl Ashley Abercrombie's post for some hilarious memes!
SOCIAL DISTANCING, NOT SOCIAL ISOLATION
Conversations will not be cancelled.
Relationships will not be cancelled.
Love will not be cancelled.
Songs will not be cancelled.
Reading will not be cancelled.
Self-care will not be cancelled.
Hope will not be cancelled.
May we lean into the good stuff that remains. ~Jamie Tworkowski
Social distancing does not have to mean social isolation. In fact, physical distancing is actually a more accurate description of what we need to practice. We need our social relationships now more than ever! Check on friends and neighbors (especially the elderly). Find ways to continue to connect. Facetime, Zoom, Group Chat, Online Support Groups and Online Therapy sessions. Whatever it takes. I personally LOVE the Marco Polo app for video chatting with friends! I use this with my accountability group.
GET INFORMED, NOT OVERWHELMED
Many of us are not only isolated, we are inundated. Our news and social media feeds are filled with information (both true and false). We can care for ourselves by doing the following:
Limit excessive continuous exposure to the media.
Set boundaries around your time
Follow trusted and official sources like: CDC.gov, PublicHealth.LACounty.gov, LAMayor.org/Coronavirus
Speaking of staying informed, did you know that in Los Angeles, according to Mayor Garcetti, ”no landlord shall evict a residential tenant in the City of Los Angeles during this local emergency period if the tenant is able to show an inability to pay rent due to circumstances related to the COVID-19 pandemic?” Learn more here. And Public Works will not shut off or stop services (Water, Power, Trash etc.) for customers who are delinquent or behind in service or permit payments until this order is lifted.
REDUCE AND MANAGE ANXIETY
It is difficult to function as our best selves when we are riddled with fear and anxiety. While it is important to acknowledge our emotional state, we can also take steps to ground ourselves and create an emotional landscape that is more conducive to peace and joy. PRACTICES
Breathing (Inhale for 4 seconds, hold 4, exhale 4, repeat)
Meditation and Prayer
Journaling
Singing
Puzzling, coloring, and reading
Create a gratitude list (Gratitude shifts our perspective and releases dopamine)
Exercise (releases dopamine and reduce stress)
Go for a drive and crank up the tunes! Or the podcast or audiobook...
5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique
Sit comfortably
Breathe Deeply
Name 5 things you can see
4 things you can feel
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
RESOURCES
Spiritual Grounding: I am LOVING the One Minute Pause App by John Eldredge. The Youversion Bible App has some great, free devotionals
PTSD Assessment, Support and Tools: PTSD COACH App
My favorite soothing music
Isolation to Invitation: A 2-week guide for retreat in a time of quarantine.
Helpful Article: Staying Out of Trauma Brain During Coronavirus
FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL
So much is beyond our control right now. It is important to stay focused on what we can control.
Take measures to protect yourself
Hydrate, rest and nourish your body
Contact your work HR department regarding work policies
Evaluate and adjust your finances
Engage with people and activities that are life-giving
GET THE HELP YOU NEED
From food, housing and transportation to health and employment, there are community resources in place to help you! Check out what is available in Los Angeles. If you are outside of LA County, you may try calling 211 or visiting http://www.211.org for resources near you. REMEMBER...There is so much that is beyond our control right now. This virus is wreaking havoc on our planet, but there are some things that it can’t take away from us unless we let it. We can still choose love, kindness, peace, thoughtfulness and generosity, whatever that looks like in our context. These unprecedented times bring unprecedented opportunity— to band together, love and serve each other like never before. PS. Please feel free to share this with anyone you think may benefit.
SUPPORT SURVIVORS THROUGH OUR EMERGENCY RELIEF FUND
$10 Essential toiletries for one woman
$35 Hope-filled care package for one woman
$50 Babysitting funds for single mothers
$100 Assistance with groceries
$500 Emergency financial assistance for those whose jobs have been affected
WE ARE HERE FOR YOU
If you have worked in the commercial sex industry and/or have been a victim of trafficking and need some extra encouragement and support, you can sign up for a free care package and additional resources here. Looking for a hope-filled book to read?
Check out my memoir, Scars and Stilettos.
*Shout out to Tracy Nielsen and Monique Calderon for helping gather this info!
ON THE GRAM
